Can't Look Away

I knew that we'd be more than friends

When I saw you shining

Somewhere in my heart I knew

Somewhere in my heart

Holding on to my belief

That you were another heart thief

Knew you'd pull my world apart

I knew it from the start

We just keep on rising

Faster than the lightning

Looking down on all below

Trying to keep control

Now the grip is tightening

Gonna keep on fighting

Somewhere in my heart I know

Somewhere in my heart

All the love you gave me

You know it made me strong

Feeling alive, now back to life

I know where I belong

I'll never let them break me

I'll never do no wrong

We're on fire, we're on fire

And we're burning up

I keep looking at you and it feels like

I've been staring at the sun, yeah you hurt my eyes

Can't look away, can't look away

I need to see it, feel it, breathe it

Don't let the light go, light go

I need to see it, feel it, breathe it

Don't let the light go, light go

I keep looking at you and it feels like

I've been staring at the sun, yeah you hurt my eyes

I keep looking at you and it feels like

I've been staring at the sun, yeah you hurt my eyes

Can't look away, can't look away

Seafret - Can't Look Away

  
...And the more I listen to this song, the deeper I fall in love, and with each new playthrough the hope for me ever getting out of this relationship seems dimmer and dimmer…
I can’t even imagine the power of one’s affection towards the other person, the adoration so strong that it has went through every word, piercing every breath the singer had taken before the lyrics have left his soul and resonated with us, enchanted listeners. And this feeling, this immense love shines on me so brightly, that it pierces my heart and my soul, so painfully yet so delightfully.
I am grateful, as in this song I’ve found all that I crave for so much, and try to find in myself every time. Although the search is almost always in vain, because these things are long gone. Erased like drawings on the sand under the harsh strikes of the endless tides.

P.S. I am so thankful to you for such a beauty I can barely handle...
 

Still Laughing

Come take a look

Because all this could mean that I
Don't really care who ends up getting hurt
Please take a look
If it's judgement versus instinct
How do I feel
When my feelings don't even work

Answer me this
Yes all I have is questions
You can't slip away and hide behind a false truth
Time takes too long
Just seems like I'm still standing here now
And I can't even feel the rain that hits my shores

Know that I'll be there
Cause I can see it in your eyes
Time stood still for me
When you call

I'm still waiting
I still breathe
That's a sign that I'm still me
I'm still breathing
I can see
So I must be alive for real
When will I get there?
I should be here by now
Got it all worked out
Did I see you laughing?
Yet funny, it's not me
In time all I want is it away
Got too long and now it's gone, it's gone

I'm still waiting
I still breathe
That's a sign that I'm still me
I'm still breathing
I can see
So I must be alive for real
So I must be alive for real
Yeah so I must be alive for real
So I must be alive for real

Lostprophets - Still Laughing

/ ...no, the echo of this laugh dissolved in time so long ago... /

Probably,  I never loved anyone the way I loved you that summer. There's no sense in trying to describe how it was like back then, because I wrote dozens of pages, trying to share this happiness and get myself free from this pain. And these memories are still so alive and bright, and still so sacred to me...

But I return to this world so rarely, because so many happy memories have found such an inglorious and tragic end. It's so unfair, it's so wrong. And I'm so sorry...

You were so beautiful inside, otherwise you wouldn't have written all of this. Otherwise, I wouldn't fell in love with you.
You were just sick and you were not given any chance to be cured. They buried you. They buried you alive. And with you they buried a part of me, which I've cherished so dearly.

I miss you and all of you guys so badly. You will always remain in my soul, as something beautiful, eternal and beloved.

Catch It

I didn't even bother myself searching for some photo, 'cause I hardly could find something more beautiful

Reeling in the line
Fully saccharine
All these stagnant words which I confide
Perish in the night
Anyway so
Here we go again
Always faintly preying
Did I note a tremble on your arm
Thereupon alarmed
Just give in

Time moves forward quickly
Moves in twenty-four
Hour segments racing for the soul
To grab chokehold
Of the minute hands
Left without a trace
Just a fleeting face
Flicker as a figment once before my eyes
Perished in the night

You want it, you want it, you want it again
Why don't you come and ask me, I adore you my friend
I said you need it, you need it, you need it again
Trust me, these arbitrary thrills will never fail to transcend

Come make me real
You reel in then you catch it
Catch it, catch it, catch it, catch it, catch it
Come make me real
You reel in then you catch it
Catch it, catch it, catch it, catch it

I said you want it, you want it, you want it again
Why don't you come and touch it, I adore you, my friend
I said you need it, you need it, you need it again
Trust me, these arbitrary thrills, they never fail to transcend
Make me real
You reel in then you catch it
Catch it
Catch it

Iceage - Catch It 

Why do I get the feeling that this song have invited me to a slow dance and I just couldn't resist this invitation?

And now in my mind I'm slowly swaying under this leisurely and ubleliavable tempting song,

gradually dissolving in this intoxicating haze...

You'll Be Fine

I see it in those eyes
You're so damn hypnotized
You wanted to pretend the voice you hear is not in your head
You wanted to escape, but you're not that innocent
Just stay for the show, don't turn around
Cause mama say don't go

I'm looking for you out there
I'm looking for truth inside your stare
I'm looking for you outside
Cause I mean it, no, I mean it, you'll be fine!
I'm looking for you this way
But you don't hear a word I say
Looking for you this time
Cause I mean it, yeah, I mean it, you'll be fine!

(You'll be fine)

Well, I can see the way she sleeps
Tonight, I find a better peace of mind
In her eyes, oh her eyes, oh her eyes, yeah
In her eyes, lord, her eyes, oh her eyes, yeah!

Have you ever felt so alone
You want to slip into the void
And never be seen again?
One day, that day is today

I see it in those eyes
You are so damn hypnotized
You wanted to pretend the voice you hear is not in your head

I'm looking for you out there
I'm looking for truth inside your stare
I'm looking for you outside
Cause I mean it, yeah, I mean it, you'll be fine!
I'm looking for you this way
But you don't hear a word I say
I'm looking for you this time
Cause I mean it, yeah, I mean it, you'll be fine!

Palaye Royale - You'll Be Fine

Hello, cutie, I'm so glad to see you back, becoming darker, heavier, stranger, more dramatic and so inviting... I'm so in love with your dark tune and these vibes of insanity you radiate. And of course, with your so damn hypnotized voice...
I hope that I will follow you into this beautiful nightmare so soon... And yes, I'm much more than just fine right now (well, maybe just a little bit dizzy), so I thank you.

A Little Death

Vacancy was lit, the guests were checking in

The concierge was cold,

The water pipes had mold all over them

The room was fit for two,

The bed was left in ruins

The neighbor was knocking, yeah

But no one would let him in

Dancing through the night

A vodka and a sprite

A glimpse of the silhouettes

A night that they never forget

She sought death on a queen-sized bed

And he had said, "Darling, your looks can kill,

So now you’re dead."

Touch me, yeah

I want you to touch me there

Make me feel like I am breathing

Feel like I am human

Touch me, yeah

I want you to touch me there

Make me feel like I am breathing

Feel like I am human, again

The Neighbourhood - A Little Death

Just a little piece of Heaven, again.
Reality is nothing / imagination is everything.
  

Somewhere I Belong

 

When this began,
I had nothing to say
And I'd get lost in the nothingness inside of me

(I was confused)
And I let it all out to find that I'm not the only person with these things in mind

(inside of me)
But all the vacancy the words revealed
Is the only real thing that I got left to feel

(nothing to lose)
Just stuck, hollow and alone
And the fault is my own,
And the fault is my own

I want to heal, I want to feel,
What I thought was never real
I want to let go of the pain I felt so long (erase all the pain 'til it's gone)
I want to heal, I want to feel
Like I'm close to something real
I want to find something I've wanted all along
Somewhere I belong

And I've got nothing to say
I can't believe I didn't fall right down on my face 

(I was confused)
Looking everywhere only to find that it's not the way I had imagined it all in my mind 

(so what am I?)
What do I have but negativity?
'Cause I can't justify the way everyone is looking at me

(nothing to lose)
Nothing to gain, hollow and alone
And the fault is my own,
And the fault is my own

I want to heal, I want to feel,
What I thought was never real
I want to let go of the pain I've held so long (erase all the pain 'till it's gone)
I want to heal, I want to feel
Like I'm close to something real
I want to find something I've wanted all along
Somewhere I belong

I will never know myself until I do this on my own
And I will never feel,
Anything else until my wounds are healed
I will never be
Anything 'til I break away from me
And I will break away, and find myself today

 

 Linkin Park - Somewhere I Belong

 

 You were the first and the biggest love of my life. 

And you always will be. 

 

 

Smoke and Mirrors

The snake eyes on the corner
Hold me down or cut me loose
...

Now I'm crawling in the way you move

But you're hiding in a blinding ...
You don't say how you're feeling, don't say how you're feeling
The way the fire in your heart is gone
You don't say how you're feeling, don't say how you're feeling

'Cause all I see is Smoke & Mirrors
While it cuts down to the bone
You said you'd never seen clearer
So say you're ...

You're safe for a sinner
Finally now I've hit the wall
The more you smoke in the mirrors

But you've set it off and now you're standing tall

But you're hiding in a blinding...

You don't say how you're feeling, don't say how you're feeling

The way the fire in your heart is gone

You don't say how you're feeling, don't say how you're feeling

'Cause all I see is Smoke & Mirrors

While it cuts down to the bone

You said you'd never seen clearer

So say you're...

Your eyes were like a movie

Well who are ya

Who are ya to me

And dressed fit for a summer

Like no other

Say who are ya, who are ya

Well who are ya, who are ya

Luna Bay - Smoke and Mirrors

I'm so in love in the dreamy tune and heartfelt guitar passages of this song, and the silent whisper of the saddness echoing in my heart... To listen to it is like swaying in the azure waves, driven by a gentle wind, far from the hustle and bustle of this life, just watching the clouds slowly sail in the sky and only the cries of seagulls break this beautiful idyll...

Inferno

 

I think you clipped my wings to save me from the sun
Forgot my hands and knees, I had to learn a lesson
Oh fearless teacher how'd I ever lose my sight
Why'd I ever try to fight against your path?

Somewhere at half my life I wandered in the woods
Can't find a single right, I swear nothing is good
I’m blinded now and darkness shrouds my every sight
Why'd I ever try to fight for my own path?

A leopard, lion, wolf and mountain in my way
I'm coming up for light and I'm coming out of the cave
Only a prodigal could understand my life
Why'd I ever try to fight against your path?

I go through hell and back and try to find my place
The poet shows me how I had to fall from grace
The devil stares me down he's trapped himself in ice
Why'd I ever try to fight for my own path?

I don't know why
I must be out of my mind
No I'm going, going, going, gone
Going, going, going, gone
I don't know why
I must be out of my mind
I'm just going, going, going, gone
Going, going, going on my own

Going on my own...
Own...

I think you clipped my wings to save me from the sun
Forgot my hands and knees, I had to learn a lesson

Sir Sly - Infereno

I'm so addicted to songs laced with lurking passion and a raw nerve. And I'm totally know why I am out of my mind.

Gold

And what did you say back to me?
Dreaming of Maybach cruising
Maybe talking crazy, but I want it
A hundred thousand ways of choosing
Who the hell is out and who's in trouble?
Maybe I'm too subtle

I'm livin' like a silent movie
Shut your mouth and see straight through me
Findin' that you're hiding in your money (money, m-m-m-money)
I got a million ways of losin'
But nothing in my life worth proving
Chasing, all my time is wasted

Mouth is made of metal, metal, metal
Pocket full of yellow, yellow, pocket full of gold
And I hope you find, I hope you find your dream
And darling never settle, settle, settle
Chasin' down the devil, devil
Chasin' down the gods
And I hope you find, I hope you find your dream

It's the push and the pull
It's the rise and the fall
I don't owe you a single thing
I don't owe you anything
It's the push and the pull
It's the big and the small
I don't owe you a single thing
Not a god damn thing

My mouth is made of metal, metal, metal
Pocket full of yellow, yellow, pocket full of gold
And I hope you find, I hope you find your dream (I don't wanna do anything)
And darling never settle, settle, settle
Chasin' down the devil, devil
Chasin' down the gods
And I hope you find, I hope you find your dream (I don't wanna do anything)

I hope you find your dream

Sir Sly - Gold

This music is a mystery to me. It seems to know something about me that I don't know by myself... Otherwise, why am I so infinitely in love with it? With this quiet voice of sadness and nostalgia, woven from the fragile weightless melodies, as indescribable and elusive as the most intimate feelings and thoughts.

And yes, it sounds so similar to The Neighbourhood, but to admit - that's why I'm here... And I'm unbelievable happy to be here.

Flawless

She planned ahead for a year, he said "Let's play it by ear"
She didn't want him to run, he didn't want her to fear
Nobody said it'd be easy, they knew it was rough
But, tough luck

I fell in love today, there aren't any words that you can say
That could ever get my mind to change
She's enough for me, she's in love with me

You're a doll, you are flawless
But I just can't wait for love to destroy us
I just can't wait for love
The only flaw, you are flawless
But I just can't wait for love to destroy us
I just can't wait for love

So, she put his heart in a bag, he wouldn't ask for it back
He didn't want her to cry, she didn't want to be sad
She said, "You better not leave me"
This shit'll be fucked for days and weeks and months, but

When I add it all up, I can find it
The problem with love is I'm blinded by
It rattles my lungs, but my mind is
Tangled between your little flaws
Your flaws, your flaws, your flaws

You're a doll, you are flawless
But I just can't wait for love to destroy us
I just can't wait for love
The only flaw, you are flawless
But I just can't wait for love to destroy us
I just can't wait for love

Wait for love, I won't wait for love
Wait for love, I won't wait for love
Wait for love

The Neighbourhood - Flawless 

/ I Love You. /

Oh my, I think I've just fell out from my life...
God, what a perfect illusory soundtrack for dreams of such an escapist like me. So let me walk away forever.

 

The Future As History: I Love You Dead

Yeah, I'm drowning in your poison

Venomous love, teeth sharp as razors, I cry

We're so honest when we're choking

When all the oxygen has burned up all of our minds

Here's where it starts

Where it starts out of my skin

I feel the warmth pour out from my crying eyes

Yeah, I love you dead

(I wanna shake the earth)

Come spit up your devotion

Upon a canvas of infinite corpses divine, oh

We're so honest when we're choking

When all the oxygen has poured out of all our minds

Here's where it starts

Where it starts out of my skin

I feel the warmth pour out from my fucking eyes

Yeah, I never wanted anything

Yeah, I never wanted anything

But I know that I love you dead

Yeah I love you dead

Night Verses - THE FUTURE AS_HISTORY: I LOVE YOU DEAD

It's freaking awesome to find something that you've never heard before. Something unique and genuine, especially when it comes to progressive post-rock with passionate vocals, so bright, so wild,  so strange - absolutely outstanding.

This perfect sound of absolute hysteria allures me. And I think that this is my new addiction.

Jenny

A little sleep, a little slumber
A little folding of the hands
Left you weak, left you hungry
When there's supply you still demand
​
You're beginning to drag the ones you love down
Will this phase ever end?
A thousand arms to hold you
But you won't reach for any hands

Bring on the pills, roll the dollar bill
Medicating will never heal
Relapse, rehab, repeat
Always thinking about the me, me, me
Self-destruct, spiral down
Until your want becomes your need
Please get up like I know you can
Or forever love the fall

Cause

I don't feel like I'm getting through to you
Let me paint this clear, life is short, my dear
See your mother here, her last painful year
I wish you only knew...
She stuck around for you
She stuck around for you

Maybe you should just fall
Leave the world and lose it all
And if that's what you need
To finally see
I'll be with you through it all

Nothing More - Jenny

 I'm absolutely paralyzed with piercing beauty of this song and heartbreaking story behind it...

This Is the Time (Ballast)

When did we become these sinking stones?
When did we build this broken home?
Holding each other like ransom notes
Dropping our hearts to grip our brother's throats

Anchored in anger, we exile ourselves
Bitter blood builds our prison cell
Darker water now fills our lungs
The depths of our heart have blacked the sun

You can't see because you don't know
You're caught below, beneath your own shadow
Stuck inside, half alive
Do you ever stop to ask yourself why?
Close your mind, identify
Do you feel, do you feel?
Do you call this a life?
All you waited for
Drowning just to keep score

We always start with good intentions
But lose ourselves along the way
This is the time that we let it go
These are the words that will take us home
Singing the song that's inside us all
If we don't open our eyes we're walking blind

Nothing More - This Is the Time (Ballast)
 

God bless the day when I heard this magnificent song...
I could never have imagined that returning home would be so incredible and bright, so sublime.
It feels like I had returned to a majestic ancient temple, and all I have to do is to fall on my knees and pray.
The strongest energy flow, exposed and vivid emotions - it just tear me apart. No, seriously, this song just left me speachless. It seems to me that my heart has turned into a dying star, which is about to explode and spill out with the rain of shattered feelings.
And deep inside I really missed the infinite depth and devastating tragedy of heavy music. After all, more than anything in the world I love when my heart is bleeding to these sounds...

The Hardest Part...

There sit two lovers
One's eyes intently chasing the other's
She doesn't love him anymore
But he'll stick it out 'til the end
This he had sworn

You see love's a funny thing
The way it lingers in the mind
No matter what you do
Or the passing of time

That ember still glows
For those lovers behind
No matter if it's well-remembered
That light still shines

Good times take precedent
Over every incident
No matter how poorly spent

So we put on these ridiculous fronts
Like we were just fooling around
Our love was only childish fun

Yet we know different
That it meant something to us
And that piece still lingers
In each one that we've loved

So we pick up the pieces
Try and make a half a whole
But in the back of our minds
There's quite a different story to be told

That love has kissed our lips
That love has touched our eyes
And no matter how sincere
Love has changed our lives

That's why love's a funny thing

And even if all love has flown
We'll have a few scars to proudly show
'Cause at the end of our lives
We can say, "At least we tried."

Lying awake in bed
Feeling the spot on my chest
Where you used to, where you used to rest your head
   

Being as an Ocean - The Hardest Part Is Forgetting Those You Swore You Would Never Forget

Thank you for one of the most heartfelt, ecstatic and inspired performances among all that I've ever seen.
And now, while listening to this beautiful heartbreaking song and wandering through my secret memories, I bow my head in silent gratefulness...

How

How could you question God's existence
When you question God himself?
Why would you ask for God's assistance
If you wouldn't take the help?

If you're gone, then I need you
If you're gone, then how is any of this real?
When I'm on, I believe you
When I'm not, my knees don't even seem to feel

How could you tell me that I'm great
When they chew me up, spit me out, pissed on me?
Why would you tell me that it's fate
When they laughed at me, every day, in my face?

They say the end is coming sooner
But the end's already here
I said today is but a rumor
That we'll laugh at in a year
Or two, or three, or four, or five, whatever

If you're gone, then I need you
If you're gone, then how is any of this real?
When I'm on, I believe you
When I'm not, my knees don't even seem to feel

How?
How could you tell me that I'm great?
How?
How could you tell me that it's fate?
How?

The Neighbourhood - How

/ So hollow, but deep /

Still darkness is my favourite tune and sadness is my favourite feeling... And this song embodied all the desperate beauty of all the things I love and crave for deeply inside. And I'm in morbid love with it. Such kind of love, when I want to take a knife and just cut my hands.